Frustrated

I've been so tired and frustrated every day I leave work for the past few months, and it's just getting worse and worse every day. I know my job is the reason why my blood pressure has been out of control, and now I'm back on 3 meds instead of 2. Our department was understaffed already with 4 of us doing the work for about 10 people. And now we're down to 2 people. And if you think I'm being paid anymore for all this extra work you're a moron. Nope, we're supposed to "keep our heads down and keep working" like our VP said. To me that's Politically correct code for " Don't pay attention while we butt rape you, and throw you away like a $2 whore as soon as the merger is complete." Moral is so low, it's virtually nonexistent. I've avoided looking for a job outside of the company for a while because I didn't want to leave the company. It's not like there are a lot of decent paying jobs in our town, and right now we can't move away or we would lose Squeaky. I worked for 2 years to get this job so it's hard to just give it up for some dead end job or worse yet going back to the pits of hell aka Chase. I've been talking to my friend, Scott, about another job option that's available to me. But it would be a complete change in careers. Actually a complete change in life. The past 2 days we've been moving heavy ass boxes full of dusty files and binders since we've just consolidated offices. I know we'll be doing the same thing Monday and possibly Tuesday. My back, legs, and feet are killing me, and I need a manicure like no one's business.

Squeaky is sick as usual. He's not too sick to play or eat, but his cough and chest congestion is horrible. You can just feel the rattling in his chest accompanied with his constantly running nose. I finally got him appointment with a new doctor on Monday, and I'm praying that this one does his job and gets him well. It's so freaking hard to find a doctor in our area (actually I've checked in a 40 miles radius) that takes Medicaid. My life would be so much easier if I could just put S on my insurance. Then he could go to any doctor I wanted. I don't think I'm being a nervous mother when I keep taking my child to the doctor because he's been sick since we got him in September! WTF?!!! That's almost 5 months and not to mention the fact that I know he was sick before we got him! He doesn't deserve to never be a healthy normal child sometimes. I'll make a list of all the meds S has been given over the past few months that haven't cleared things up to show the new doctor so we don't end up with the same med again. I need results. I'll let everyone know how the doctor visit goes on Monday.

We also have to get our house cleaned up for our re-certification evaluation with our new home development worker on Wednesday. It doesn't seem like it's been 6 months since we got certified. We will finally get to meet our new worker since the one that certified us moved to a new office back in October. I need to fill out the paperwork she sent us too. But first I need to find it in all of the piles of mail on my desk.