Thursday, December 4, 2008


I wish I could open up a 12 pack right now!

I should have known that it would start at some time. I've read and talked to enough foster parents to know that everyone has problems with a birth parent at some point, but I was hoping it wouldn't be that way for us. But no such luck. I found a note in Squeak's baby bag tucked into a diaper. This wasn't even one of his diapers and it was wrapped up in his extra clothes that I send to daycare just in case he needs to change. The note stated that BM had some concerns after her 10/25 visit. Then she proceeds to list things that we need to do like send more bottles and diapers with him, dress him warmer, send a coat, and put a full skull cap on him. Then it says that she knows that it's hard, but we need to do better next time. What the fuck?! Did that teenage bitch just try to tell me what I need to do? Yep, she thinks that I need instructions from her. I was beyond pissed when I found that Tuesday morning. I'm not even sure when it was put in his bag because 10/25 was a Saturday, and we don't do visits on Saturdays. Plus I always send him with a coat or long sleeves and a blanket if it's not extremely cold. Maybe I'm overreacting, but I've never been a person to take being talked down to lightly.

I called the social worker to let her know about this note, and she said that she will talk to her about why this is not acceptable. She was not aware that the BM had slipped a note in the bag. The SW actually sounded upset by the letter which shocked me. She said for us to not worry about it and give her the original. I'll make a copy of it for our records and give her the original to put in the file. I also learned that this isn't the 1st time the BM has complained about us. She complains about his shoes because he's not wearing Nike or K-swiss. I put him in Bobux or Robeez just to keep his socks on and to keep his feet warmer. But they aren't good enough for her hoodrat ass. She bitches because she's only seen us once at a visit even though the worker keeps telling her that we both work fulltime and don't have time to come to the weekly visits. I don't see why the hell she needs to see us, she's not visiting us. My friend thinks that the reason she wants us to come to the visits is to start something with us to make us look bad.

Today Squeak had his weekly visit and came back with more stuff from his mom or at least I assume it's from her. There wasn't a note saying who it was from since he's gotten stuff from his former babysitter and foster parents. There was a pack of footed pjs, some socks, a baby activity mat, and some damn hand sanitizer. The first thing that comes to mind is why the hell would you give a baby a big bottle of hand sanitizer. It's freaking poisonous! The 2nd thing that comes mind is I think she may be incenuating that she thinks we're not clean. Oh yes, I gave the baby ear infections. I gave him the thrush that he came to our house with. Yep, it's all me, nasty, dirty me. Stupid bitch! I'm not even going to spend the time on the phone with the social worker tomorrow about the sanitizer. I'll just wait until she comes Monday to do her monthly visit.


Patty said...



I'd like to meet her in a dark alley. Although she wouldn't like the outcome. BITCH!

Mindy said...

Ashley, I'm so sorry. I can't believe that after having her baby taken away that she feels she has any right to tell you or anyone else what to do with a baby! I hope that the social worker can straighten things out so you don't have to deal with it anymore. Geez!

So, are you guys going to get to adopt your precious little squeak?

Dream Mommy said...

1.Do not send extra diapers, they will get taken.
2. Same goes for expensive name brand clothes or shoes.
3. If mom wants name brand,let her buy them. She just wants an expensive freebie from you.
4. Moms will blame you for the things they cannot do themselves.
5. Don't send too many bottles, she will overfeed him then.
6. A blanket is fine, so he can be safely buckled in the carseat without all the extra clothing. Is she planning on taking him outside for the entire visit.
7. Send pictures(if your not already doing this) about twice a month. never had a mom complain about pictures.

Try not to worry. I had a mom complain about ear wax and boogers in the nose once.

Get a notebook about document things everyday with the baby.

Kristine said...

Unbelievable! I would feel the same way you do. I'm sorry that you have to deal with someone like that, and yes, it's probably better you're not there for visits, especially after that note!

Maddie's Mom said...

Dream Mommy, thanks for the tips. The daycare is the one that sends his bottle since he's picked up from there to go to his visits. They send 1 since he's only going to a 1 hour visit. I've got a notebook now, and will start compiling all my notes. The funny and sad thing is that I've sent her 1 picture, and she complained about it. She said his head looked too big in it. It was a very cute professional picture. I guess some people just like to complain.

Maddie's Mom said...

Mindy, we're actually a long way away from being able to adopt him. Everything stays up in the air until his birthmom's rights are terminated witch can take a long time.